`-paradoxyness.

2006-09-19T07:31:00.000-07:00

HAHAHA!! EOYs are coming, and see me go crazy due to the immense pressure. no band practices at the moment and much more remedials plus tuition. how nice! i've become a sadist. lol. well, i hate trigonometry, especially the part about trigo graphs. but i went totally nuts today during tuition. i was in fact, TOO high. yijun taught me trigo identities and i was like..WOW..and was so fascinated. i was never like this, was i? anyway, yar, and there were apparently many formulas to be remembered but, she made it so so easy for me to memorise them? luckily i do not have much hatred towards maths, so i could still cope with studying a math. she's like, a magician? I have totally no idea how she managed to do that as well. Anyway, i was really crazy today, and my tuition teacher can't stand me, but she was happy, because at least i wasn't that stressed up. But she kept nagging..lol. and her favourite quote,' Why is time ticking and crawling so so slowly today!!' that's haha, caused by me, because i was too annoying. she's gonna turn old soon and be my babysitter. that would be so so hilarious. hmm, imagine myself wearing a bib? nahhh!

2006-08-28T06:37:00.000-07:00

you can actually not bother reading this entry as it might be hurting.

a dreadful day. shant say too much. but just felt like really venting my anger, my frustrations on this blog. i had seriously headache, since yesterday. that's not really the point, just that i felt really drowsy during lesson time and i refused to take panadol because it isnt good especially during maths and SEE lessons.

the main thing i wanna say is..im pathetically useless. sometimes i really wish to do things, but either don't have the courage or something will just intervent and block me from doing so. sectionals, sigh. yeahh, i lead them in a bit of poetic intermezzo, but still, it was the same as not even teaching them. i dont know how. i dont wanna teach them the harsh way, like what previous seniors have done. you can never force a person to love music, to appreciate music, besides, i respect them, i should. but i really dont know how to teach them. sometimes i even fear that i might hurt them. people think that im too lenient, yeah i feel the same way too, but seriously, why force a person to love something when they hate it? and if i am overdoing it, they might think that i've overabused my powers.

mr tan and ms mok lectured us. i've got the feeling that she was kinda indirectly refering to me. nvm. and yeah, i know about all these and i was smirking, in the sarcastic manner kinda. and wanted to stress something. common test, it's plain nothing, and i meant NOTHING! it's just like our class test alright? why fred over such small matters and make it as if it's soo BIG when it isnt. well well, good excuse to skip band practices, but have you ever wondered how the rest of us felt? hatred..and the truth is that, last minute mugging isnt gonna help much anyway. 'but band's so time-consuming!! i would have been a top pupil if i didnt join band..' yeah yeah what kind of rubbish is that. lame freaks. jerks..just admit that you're losers. and small headache or flu or whatever isnt a good as an explanation to give to mr tan as well. hahaha..many people still come for practices. beat me into it then..i've got high fever, flu, headaches, sorethroat, and i felt cold. well, i still came for band practices. cuz i gotta prove (esp to my section) that you still can go for practices, it's whether you want or not. just think for others alright? think about mr tan at least, he's really a kind soul. so i went with my jacket for band. just for band, i've forced myself to go to school on mon and wed and im sick for a week.

ehh.actually, just ignore all the loads of crapp okay? and if you dont feel good after reading this, im truely sorry, because i could not think of other ways to vent it all out.sigh.

how can i resolve these problems? i shall let nature take it's course...

2006-08-01T05:01:00.000-07:00

well well, had dental appointment today.so i left early.skipped a bit of lit, geog and maths remedial.haha.tmr have to sit for math and geog test.so this is gonna be short.well, put on braces today.chose purple..and turned out..yucky.it was the pastel kind of purple, and looks like pink.and after eating my dinner, IT BECAME PINK!!..YUCKS!!..omg omg omg..putting braces is a pain in the ass.mwahahaha.im such a lamo. X)

2006-07-28T20:59:00.000-07:00

:)

31/7/06 {mon}

today was super duper cool.shant talk about physics lesson.got lecturing and have to stay back for 15mins during recess.ms moo, haha, i think she's being quite nice to me now.haha.den english.stupid yangjie sabotaged me to be a debater and i ended up pushing alina to do the job for me..sorry X) so so..den got maths, naggings from mrs quek as usual, and she said that we did really badly in our e maths test, and comparison of RI and HCI again..blah blah blah.

chin hui yi, siling, mr sandridge ong and i went ntu today.woohoo!!..super cool.but chin, siling and i were totally freaked out. anyway, yeahh..ntu is really nice. saw this really huge grass patch that is a slide, and it was something to do with bio researches. den we took taxi there..bill was $19+..our eyes literally popped out..lol. so discussed about future, education stuff..den dunno why go to transport. and the mama's and papa's express(: super cute.nvm.im insane. ate japanese food there, it wasnt bad and quite cheap. so, met the professor, was not as old and as unfriendly as we thought. he's so..FUNNY!!very easy-going person. recorded our conversation together.den i was like pushing the questions that i wanna ask him to chin or siling cuz my voice like..okay.the feeling is like you haven speaked for long and when you suddenly speak, it's that kind of after effect. so he laughed at some of my questions haha..well, he's quite humorous, which i like about him.yay he's so kind:) so we had to take a photo with him, and i wanted to..mess his hair yes..but.he's a prof.so forget it.was deciding if we should go back for band, and we went back home instead (: so took cab to jurong point and mrt all the way back..1 1/2 h journey.was super tiring.but was fun.MARSILING!!..lol.siling is just so so lame and so easily fascinated by stuff esp being at the jurong east platform if im not wrong. while we struggled to stay awake for the rest of the journeys back home, good mr ong sat a cab back!! grr.no lar, but bills will explode.he'll just go bankrupt.so yeah.and he wants us to message him ones we get back home. and i went,'HELLO!!! i've reached home.mwahahaha:)' so yeah..asked yee and janice about band today.said that i have to conduct on wed.gaa.and pirates of caribbean solo janice and angeline play.mr tan didnt notice siling and i gone..which is GOOD! haha.and now im busying blogging and practicing my clar because, yeahh, tmr, i'll have my braces on. today will be my last day not to have my mouth covered with metals, but only metal seperators..wahahaha..

me talking to my dear too.i love my dear.yay yay!! haas.was sad in the being but yeah yeahh.

30/7/06 {sun}

o well well, dear has brightened up my day.whee! dear helped me in the retarded ten newspaper article.thanks.yay yay.too happy to blog. :D

29/7/06 {sat}

..gonna have tuition.skipped piano :D and busy pracitising my clar.since mon i cant go for band because of the stupid ntu interview. and wed i probably cant play properly, i'll be putting my braces on tues so can pon school in the late mornings mwahahaha! im lazy to blog now.and i must find lots and lots of questions for my tuition teacher to solve because i have A maths test on mon. so tata!!

28/7/06 {fri}

nothing much i think..i have stml..so yeapp.and the main thing i should stress is..ms moo was SO SO SURPRISED that i did the chinese comprehension thingy and halfway through the stupid 10 jian bao!!..so she talked to me really nicely when i kept asking her to translate to chinese or how to write a particular word while i was busy trying to finish up my 10 reflections.HAHA x)anyway, had sectionals, kinda sucky, hid and keep locking the storeroom so that i can play the lion king soundtrack song for lining to hear..and we were so pathetic..haha.i had to write the notes on the packaging for her..couldnt find any source of writing material..so yeahh yeahh.den after sectionals went to mac with lining, belle, linying.so funny..yz..lol.and they are so mean.they kept something from me while i tried to be a stupid monkey making a fool out of myself at macdonald's trying to snatch their phones away.lol.then went back home.so lame!!

27/7/06 {thurs}

THE MOST DISGUSTING DAY!!cuz i had to conduct.bloody hell.and mr lam was conducting the band with me.and i was like,'err..you conduct ah, den i go le okay?..byee!! :)' but he called me to stay..grr.and you dont see bands being conduct by 2 person..only for mcb..yeah yeah.i screwed up the timing, had splinters caught in my fingers, thanks to the baton which is so in a very 'good' condition. well, and i caught alina and jiaxin 'spying' on me..felt like slapping their heads..nvm.i smirked at them.anyway, i was pissed.with mr lam, with my super lousy conducting, with people, with the band..yes, blame me for not being able to conduct well, but even if the person in front was mr tan, it would still be bad.i could not say much, but just let the song be played on.everything sounds super empty.i mean it.and i dont blame mrs lim for saying mean things..it was the truth.it sounded really like a death march.period.

the nice part is that, pe was super fun.beginning was sucky.contradicting?yeahh.mrs leong didnt come, so mr kwek had to take 4A and 3J for pe.he was like pms-ing.made us run around the school for 2 times, from stomach crunch, change to push ups, in repeated cycles. den we played our on stuff. i was deciding if i should re-run, but i was seriously too lazy, and we played a really fun came of powerball!!FUN FUN!!

23/7/06-26/7/06

i seriously dunno.i've SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS SO YEAHH..LOL!

2006-07-22T06:34:00.000-07:00

bear with me for not updating regularly.well, i had to now limit myself from using the comp.

TODAY!!..

((: nice fine happy day. had tuition. went crazy with yijun while she 'struggled' to teach me chem(her fav subject) as i always like to start with maths hw first X). den she recap about the calculation part. and yeah.it was pretty easy after seeing a few examples. dear came to my house after that. nice nice. did homework..and played bingo.fun fun!! yeah so im pretty exhausted. tata!!

dear, you never fail to enable me to see colours in my life.i love you with all my heart, and never forgetting the wonderful time we spend together.missing you..(:

21.07.2o06 {fri}

well well, chem was fun.did 6 ionic equations in roughly 15-30 mins. i managed to complete them. it's really fun once you get the hang of it. got them correct, woohoo.and ms parimala sort of snatched my paper away from yee so that she wouldnt copy my work, but i helped her anyway..since im so kind.PUKE!!den chinese. dont bother saying. chinese always suck so yeahh. den ms kaur. had lit test, and i wrote super little. i was having mental block. nevermind. ss? ms cheng didnt come..so it's a yay!! the relief was at the hall and got a chance to disturb sophie yuyan may and lining.

no english because had to proceed to the hall for racial harmony stuff. den i saw yuyan and lining in sari already.haha.look at my class.no one bothered to wear the clothes.anyway, some went to say their poems and yee and i were reciting our poems and were complaining to each other about why we couldnt present it today because we would not have the energy to laugh and that it would be much nicer. me and jing also sort of slept. we really felt very exhausted.

after school, went to lining's house and ransacked her room.mwahahaha.anyway, just went her house to do some work and waste time. preparing to go to RI concert yeah yeah. met up with yuyan and huiwen and THEY took so long to decide where we should have our dinner, well, ended up at pastamania haha. i went nuts. and lining scared me. on the way there, i was so super clumsy. i stepped on the drain cover with the heels of my shoe and 'PRUNG!'. am i that forceful? lol.den lining cant help laughing.and we reached VCH late. .was held up outside.

the instruments were shimmering under the glaring spotlights and i was really staring hard at the key players' fingerings especially of course paul's fingerings.(the soloist/sl of clar i suppose) den after the interval, the songs that they played were nicer, because they presented it in an ensemble manner.cool!

was in the mrt.den i went nuts again.and went back home..really fun.yeahh (: and my brother is finally home. but he's suffering, still.

20.o7.2o06 {thurs}

i rushed to school to meet lining, then we traded shoes because she wore bright orange socks, so had to cover, while mine's grey, but it wasnt that obvious so yeahh. so jing and yibing were comparing 'my' shoes and yee's shoes.mwahahaha!! conclusion: yee felt miserable. so had our compo test. i wrote about the syf incident. it seriously was an unforgetable experience, and following up, we had pe.

well well, i tried so so hard not to perspire but thanks to mrs leong and mr kwek, we were made to run. 1 round. and then warm down in the sultry hot weather. we're like, BURNT..especially me. played volleyball and it was so so fun haha!

had to bathe after pe because i smelt so stinky and sweaty and sticky.thanks yingting!!so got changed and talked to may yuyan and lining for a while then had to rush up to class for 'detention'.

was ss after that.i knew i forgot to do her work but i didnt bother copying because i felt that there wasnt enough time anyway.so was being punished, and all apparently and surprisingly were girls.(yingting, sherlyn, yee, pat, kyna, me, alina.that's about it.) it was better than being in class though. so we stayed until the lesson nearly ended though we've finished.den came mrs quek.so copy notes for a little while and we needed to go.anyway to some people, thanks for saying that my dressing was cool though i dont think it is lol.so anyway, went bandroom.

well, i was upset. shall not elaborate more on this point.den happy (:..just felt that we're so smart and cunning..mwahahaha...shh shh.

so the concert really sucked to the core. but i felt that the band had a better sound control over at the bras basah nlb.it sounded much much nicer, but still. it's expected. it still sounds like shit. and the songs that we play arent nice either. band, is of no hope now until there's someone to rule it. so the whole thing ended pretty late and i went totally insane in the bus. i freaked isabelle and lining out..sorry.but when i feel ticklish i'll laugh my head off.lol.well, she sat on my stomach.haha!!

2006-07-19T06:11:00.000-07:00

shall apologise for not updating.it was 'under maintenance' so please bear with it.

ok so about todayy..

19.07.2o06

woke up pretty early in the morning and attended chong boon sec 5th student council investiture with yee hui yi. so dumb. haha. so we had to take a taxi since stupid yee couldnt catch josiah about how to get to that place. and she nearly cheated my money. GRR. anyway, it was pretty boring, and yee and i were like hiding in a corner, kind of, and we were like so so anti-social. den i saw this girl from other school who looks super super familar.and im like 99% sure that she acted on tv before so i asked yee, well everyone knows. she's just too dumb to catch all this.lol. so they took lots of photos, toured around the school, ate mee siam, and blah blah blah..NEVER MIND!

yee and i then took a long time to get back to school and yeahh, it was recess time. but we were so super shock that everyone was still in class. well well, it was detention. not surprising. and they said that from today onwards we will have detention for 15mins. and we're supposed to be discussing about physics in our groups. it's so dumb. i mean, seriously, what's the whole point of giving the whole class detention. if we dont like a particular subject, you cant FORCE us to like it. we can do whatever we like to do, since it's our future, it lies in our hands, so what for bother. how i wish singapore is free, like america. then even students can have the right to stand up and say about certain stuff.

yee's skirt got problem, i know im not supposed to laugh but i just dunno why i kept laughing, so yeah really sorry. had chinese test, the stupid cheng nan jiu shi novel and i just like crap my whole way through. once again, ms moo picked on me. geog's boring. den lit was pretty funny and cool. ms kaur (XXL nanny mcphee) had pms i guess. she kept shouting at us and, it is, seriously FUNNY!!..and she irritated kyna and yeapp, she said ****.COOL COOL!!mwahahaha..

band after school.always sucky. when can i ever look forward to a good band practice, i wonder, it's like only in a million year. got a new score, everyone thought it was just another chinese song but it's japanese. it's pretty nice. (obviously, because i have a solo part =X) ok that's not the point. everyone keeps rushing for the other pieces, it's not the first time. i feel like shouting to the band, "stop all the 'noise' lar, where's your eyes? mr tan is not sitting there to do nothing de lor. he's conducting us man! but you guys treat him as if he doesnt even exist!" and i've got the temptation to just push down my music stand and storm out of the band room. band's like..worse to..undescribable.all the seniors efforts have all come down to a waste.*sarcastic laugh*

came back home, really tired. and my brother is still unconcious. my parents didnt wanna take me along because they preferred me to study. kor, please get well, really. i may not show it, but deep in my heart, i really meant everything i say.

dear, very sorry that i never spent time with you. sigh sigh. please forgive me. and please dont think too much and stop doing silly things. really wish for you to be happy again.sniff.

sadded lar..

18.o7.2o06

had to attend wedding dinner. ended super late and i was darn tired. was also a sad day, and my brother got admitted to sgh. good luck bro.:) i'll set more than 5 birds for you. :X

17.o7.2o06

i couldnt really recall what happened.but ermm.obviously, we had band.and i think i was pretty fed up? and it was a really really really bad day.

2006-07-16T06:24:00.000-07:00

haha.yeahh you arent blind.im back blogging after months or years i believe? okk and thanks to huiwen my blog is being revived again.thankeww soo soo much!! :X anyway just ignore abt the side stuff.i'll get it updated when i feel like it.

so get back to the HOT topic.the main reason for me blogging here yet again is just to vent my anger and frustrations.so today no band.so there's nothing i should be complaining about.and today is a really memorable day.so i shant think about things which would get me upset about.

TODAY!yes yes.im getting fatter.my brother is going for jaw operation on the 19/7/06 (wed).so my parents bought sumptuous meals for my brother and i.den i pestered lining to come to my house.den did hw and yeah.mainly it was my fault for not giving her motivation.you cant blame me.i cant concentrate and focus well.i cant sit still.so yeah.thus im an example of a person with a hollow brain, not meant for studying.anyway sorry dear.

lalala.flag day was yesterday.yes it was tiring.it worn me out.but we SLACKED.and guess wad.my can was less than 1/8 filled.mwahahaha.i shall stress that it wasnt a volunteer work.we were FORCED!so yeah.so bleah.

tmr.another day that i should be dreading about.yes.band.what have i got to say about it.but anyway it doesnt affect my love for music in anyway. i will never let that happen. over my dead bodies man! so it officially starts at about 3pm due to o level chinese listening comprehension.so good luck to you people, esp.lol.

ok never mind.shall say about my hatred for band.haha.so, so.yeah may scolded us.it was absolutely right.she didnt really miss out a single thing.sometimes i hope that she and the rest of the seniors are still around.now the seniors graduates, then the juniors misses them.wad's the whole point now? it's far too late man.i love band.the band in year 2004.it was of so much fun.ups and downs.but who cares.band is what we think of as our 2nd home.to me, truely my home.we go for band very happily, with a purpose: to strive hard and get a gold. so what if we've got a silver back.it was still of very fond memories.but now?..sigh.dont wish to elaborate.just wishing for the best.at least, silver again.and now im forced to thinking that my parents are really really ruining my life.for i want to be in basketball.

im done with band.lol.so so.tomorrow.lol.im gonna read part of jinghui's poem.lol.phew.not mine :) so.hope that i dont stutter and get too nervous.lala!!

2006-07-16T05:53:00.000-07:00

huiwen here, testing (: LOL